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Don’t Give Up on Others
“Part of being optimistic is keeping one's head pointed toward the sun, one's feet moving forward. There were many dark moments when my faith in humanity was sorely tested, but I would not and could not give myself up to despair. That way lays defeat and death.”
—Nelson Mandela
There is no pain quite like the pain of betrayal from a close friend, a spouse, or a family member. Betrayal is a devious thing. When we have let down our walls and exposed our hearts and innermost insecurities to someone, and then they take advantage of that trust, it cuts us more deeply, in a way that nothing else can. It makes us feel like we are inadequate, left behind, undervalued, and replaced—like a tool to be used and disregarded. In the wake of betrayal, we experience waves of pain, hate, and the desire for them to feel the same pain that we have experienced. The betrayal can haunt us through life, causing us to obsess over it and leading us to be consumed with the “why” that makes the betrayal especially gruesome. We become withdrawn, discouraged, and depressed, and we build a wall around our heart a mile high, never to let anyone in again out of fear of what they might do. It becomes easy to be perpetually suspicious of the motives of others, even when their efforts of kindness and benevolence are sincere. When left unchecked, your suspicion grows into full-on cynicism, causing you to lose your faith in humanity altogether. So, how does one face betrayal, the fear in one’s heart, and overcome the feeling that there is no kindness left in the world? The answer is simple: forgiveness.
You do not have the power to control the actions of others, but you do have the power to control how you will respond to those actions. Hate, unforgiveness, and cynicism act as a chain, tying you to the past. They doom you to relive the betrayal and see that betrayal everywhere.
Furthermore, in order to receive the Lord’s help and receive deliverance from the hurt you are experiencing, you must forgive. Hate or unforgiveness is never the answer. The Bible tells us that unforgiveness hinders our prayers and hate paralyzes our faith. As impossible as it may seem to forgive someone who has purposely hurt or betrayed us, it is possible with the Lord’s help, and it is an essential element to getting past the painful event.
There is power in forgiveness to break the chains of hatred, resentment, and hurt and bring deliverance and freedom to your heart. You can find comfort and peace in the Lord’s presence and in His Word. You will find strength, confidence, and encouragement in His Word.
Prayer
Lord, help me to be quick to forgive others, just like You have forgiven me. Help me not to condemn or judge others, even when their actions have hurt me. Help me to love them and pray for them. Help me not to let the betrayal and deception of others cause me to become bitter or vengeful. Heal my heart, and help me not to be judgmental or cynical toward others in the future. By Your grace and through Your love, restore my soul. Help me to let Your love, light, and life shine through me to those around me. Finally, help me to move on from the past and enjoy a wonderful life in You. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.
Scriptures
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
—Ephesians 4:32
Bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.
—Colossians 3:13 (NKJV)
He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly.
—1 Peter 2:23 (NLT)
Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven.
—Luke 6:37
But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.
—Matthew 5:44
An Encouraging Story of Somebody Who Did Not Give Up on Others:
There was a lady who had to live through the Holocaust. She had to endure terrible acts of atrocity from the hands of her captors at the concentration camp known as Ravensbruck. One of these atrocities was to watch her sister die. Later, she would come back to a defeated Germany and preach to the people about love and forgiveness. A man pushed through the crowd towards the front, and as he stood there before the lady, she recognized him as one of the guards from the camp. He had since become a Christian and held out his hand to her and asked if she would forgive him. Her response:
“Still I stood there with the coldness clutching my heart. But forgiveness is not an emotion—I knew that too. Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. ‘Jesus, help me!’ I prayed silently. ‘I can lift my hand, I can do that much. You supply the feeling.’ And so woodenly, mechanically, I thrust my hand into the one stretched out to me. And as I did, an incredible thing took place . . . I had never known God's love so intensely as I did then.”
-Corrie Ten Boom
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